Posted 20 hours ago

Losing It: A taboo-busting guide to sex and relationships that debunks the myths you were taught at school.

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She uses factual reference from various studies to back up points, but also interviews with a variety of people affected by a lack of proper sex-positive knowledge plus her own anecdotal references; this makes it a very accessible read and one which should be made widely available. A virginal bride, then, is a status symbol that represents a guarantee that a wife will be submissive.

Even our euphemisms in English for virginity loss – deflowering, popping or busting a cherry – denotes fruit or a flower that is ripe for the taking, and consumed without trace. She grew up in a Southern Baptist community, where she was taught things like ‘sex before marriage is a sin that grieves the heart of God’ or that it was ‘the sin next to murder’. In Losing It, Smith Galer shares the eye-opening stories of ordinary people affected by sex misinformation and finds that many of us are unable to access the world of sexual freedom that we’ve been promised. It’s so sad what some people are doing to themselves (surgery) due to societal pressure, when it’s just not needed.

Modern sex educators now know to use other phrases about first-time sex – sexual debut or initiation – but many don’t understand the reasons why it is important to do so. In the Arthurian quest for the Holy Grail, the cup that Jesus was said to drink from during the Last Supper, it is only Galahad who can actually claim it because he is a virgin. I myself have learnt lots from reading this and dispelled myths I’d grown up believing, I intend to use this knowledge to inform my youngest child still in primary education not to far off secondary and give her knowledge I certainly didn’t have available for myself or first born.

She also raises a number of very important medical issues and briefly explores how to get help for some of these. Before we use the word incel, we need to understand what it means, who it is exactly we are criticising and – vitally – who it is that needs help. Thank you NetGalley, Sophie Smith Galer and William Collins for an Arc copy in exchange for an honest review. I liked that there was a lot of focus on internet culture and how it changed the sex education older generations had compared to those who grew up with the internet. There was another, different response to Reno Omokri’s tweet, hidden among its many replies: ‘And what about men … if men have had premarital sex, what makes them worthy of marrying a virgin?If that doesn't work, there may be a network issue, and you can use our self test page to see what's preventing the page from loading.

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